The life of Paulncheryl

In LA

So here we are in LA. Driving has been a rather interesting experience with unfamiliar road rules like car pool lanes or yellow strips indicating turning lanes that either side of the road can use and potentially lead to a game of "chicken".

Cheryl and I went to Six Flags Magic Mountain for some of the craziest roller coaster rides ever...

The largest and craziest was the Goliath. The positive G's we pulled actually could be felt compressing our lower back and necks. The Goliath and another ride, The Riddler's revenge, also put huge amounts of pressure on your legs. All in, it was GREAT fun.

Met up with Keemin the other day for dinner and also to visit his church. The Jap place we went for dinner in Little Tokyo was AWESOME! 333 Alameda Road off W 3rd St. Fantastic grilled items and sets. Thanks to Keemin for dinner!

Not by Might nor by Power but by My Spirit

0181, originally uploaded by Paul & Cheryl.

I have entitled this entry "Not by Might nor by Power but My Spirit" because this reflects the state of affairs in my law school education.
When I got in all I was looking for was to pass my modules and get decent enough grades to practice. I enrolled in a year where the batch of students were particularly good and competitive. These were the best and brightest, many scholarhship holders, accustomed to straight As. I admittedly on the other hand am not. We are all graded on a curve which essentially pits us against each other. So it comes with great shock that I find that almost a year into the course I am not only holding my own but acheiving straight As.

The course has not been with moments when I have felt totally inadequate, lost, confounded, confused, even dumb but God has constantly provided me answers, solutions and knowledge that just pops up in my head out of nowhere. There has been many a time when I didn't think I could do something or understand the answer. Just when the chips are down, God has always provided a sliver of knowledge or word of advice which "turns on the light". It is as if God is saying "Don't doubt Me."

It is incredible that I am understanding and getting stuff that others don't because I am definitely a "brainy" person.

Truly this is a case of neither by the might nor power of my abilities but by God's Spirit.

Romans 8:28

Romans 8:28. A verse oft cited as a promise of things to come but recently I came to understand the true meaning of this verse. Surrender.

In early 2007, I submitted an application to read law under the Graduate LLB Programme. Expectations of getting accepted were high and after I submitted it I largely put the application aside until a week before an interview and written test that I was to attend to be gauged as a suitable candidate. Prior to the interview and test I was to receive a letter from the university by the weekend before to indicate that I had been short listed. As the date drew nearer, there was no sign of a letter, an email to the admission office confirmed that a letter or email should be received by the end of the week. My hopes were starting to fade.

As I was mulling the possibility that I would not be short listed I happen to read an interview a missionary had given the church newsletter and Romans 8:28 was highlighted as a verse to get you through tough times. While lying in bed I was curious what this verse was (the interview had not given the text and I am no whiz at memorizing bible verses). As I flipped to the verse in the bible and pondered its meaning carried in those 25 words (NIV), God began to speak to me that it was about surrendering. Surrendering one’s ambitions and plans and truly just trusting and leaning on Him. However, the lesson was not complete.

Come that fateful Saturday by which I was to receive that all-important letter to indicate my continued candidacy, I had mixed feelings. My exterior and behaviour indicated nothing different from my usual routine but inside I was in turmoil. As I checked the mailbox with my wife, there was a bill, the usual junk mail, but no invitation for an interview. I would no say my world shattered but it was as if someone had hit tempered glass with a hammer and the fractures spread across the entire surface. I felt quite empty the rest of the day and it was a long day. My wife tried to engage me but I was rather reticent.

I began to think about what it all meant and how it would affect my plans. Sunday was spent avoiding the subject and when it was mentioned in conversations with friends and family it still smarted. As I began the process of dealing with the issue, I found that much of it was pride, and the stinging was from asking myself why was I not considered good enough to be even short listed. During a conversation with my parents I had to think about what my other possible options were. Although there were several choices none seemed as good but what choice did I have.

Throughout the two days Romans 8:28 kept ringing in my mind and began to accept it but what I thought was surrender was truly mere resignation. They are not the same. Resignation is when you have no control and no power. Surrender is when you still have options but choose to give them up. My wife asked me a poignant question, “Do you think it was God’s will for you to do law?” I couldn’t answer her for I truly did not know. On the train to work on Monday I surveyed my options and decided I had to truly seek God for what he wanted out of my life. Thus far my career seemed to have been traveling a road that was fraught with frustration and leading to nowhere. I began the surrender process.

Later that evening my wife called me and in the most nonchalant manner possible told me to come home quickly, I knew something was afoot and quizzed her. She disclosed that I had received a letter from NUS. At this stage I was rather reluctant to get my hopes up and tried to downplay the significance. As she read out the contents, my phone died as she was about to reveal the letter’s objective, my mobile’s battery died. I spent agonising minutes search for a pay phone before I could find out that I had been short listed. The letter had arrived two days late.

As I reflect on the episode, God in those few days had taught me a valuable lesson, that, He is King. He allowed all hope to slip away, for me to search what He truly wanted from me. Then as I surrendered control of my life to Him, and gave it up, He restored hope. I haven’t been interviewed nor taken the test and I definitely don’t know if I will be accepted into law school but I know this. That all we have to do is surrender and seek God’s will and He will take better care of us than we can imagine.

How I longed to see the hour,
When I would hear that trumpet sound
And rise to see my Savior's face,
See Him smile and say “Well done.”

You can forget my name and the songs I’ve sung,
Every rhyme and every tune,
But remember the truth of Jesus’ love,
When all is said and done.

Geoff Moore & The Distance
From “When all is said and done”